Annual Conference Commissioning Ceremony

Well,

To set the stage: I went to the United Methodist Annual Conference Commissioning Ceremony because St. Paul (my church) had two, count 'em, two people being commissioned. We went early, early, early to this shindig because I had been forewarned that seats would go like hotcakes. They filled a baroque sanctuary with 1000 people - all but a handful of whom were in place about 30 minutes before anything started. It did give me time to look over First Methodist - that magnificent edifice that I've driven past for 16 years.

The sanctuary is dominated by the pipe organ with pipes hanging on the walls on either side of the choir loft. The building with its lofted, soaring ceiling reminded me of the Anglican cathederal I was in near Cambridge, England when we went to a concert by the London Philharmonic. Unfortunately that's where the comparison ended............to put it kindly, the music in this ceremony tonight was just terrible. In the opening concert, it was all strum und drang (storm and stress) - referring to emotional upheaval. Lots of crescendo and banging of the keys. I kept thinking during this performance, "yep, that there's a pipe organ". Actually I winced during some of it with it's predictable pounding. So, that was a big disappointment. The hymns were picked according to which ones would be the most boring to sing and listen to. Their only redeeming value were some of Charles Wesley's lyrics - but the tunes represented the worst of 18th century music.

Therefore, the sermon by the Boston Ave United Methodist (Tulsa, OK - my hometown) preacher was a pleasant surprise. I especially loved his closing. Let me see if I can approximate it: Draw a circle and a square on a piece of paper. Inside the square write down the names of people who have shamed you in your life. Inside the circle write down the names of people who have lifted you up. Then ask youself, if you had to look at the papers of people you know - where would your name be on their papers? Of course he dressed it up with a football theme, but that was the gist. He made the point which I think is so true: shame is when you feel bad about yourself, not to be confused with guilt which is when you feel bad about something you did or didn't do.

I guess it was a revelation to me that there are some "assigned" emotions that are worst than guilt - and I hadn't realized shame would be one of them. Shame is really a very old fashioned word - rather out of fashion these days. I can remember hearing as a child the phrase "Aren't you ashamed of yourself?" I can't think of the last time I even heard that in any context. Is that a good or bad thing if we think of shame as being a societal socializing emotion? Hmmmm. Have to think about that. Does shame have a place in a society?

OK - back to the commissioning. The cememony itself was very moving - I didn't even embroider during it. Hey, now that's high praise. Actually, I was so happy for Jimmy and Marilyn. Especially Jimmy. I've known him for so long, and I know how hard he has worked for this. He feels called by God - what a magnificent gift. To be called. Marilyn's achievement was awe inspiring. I know it's taken her eight years to get to this ceremony tonight. I've been to doctors with less training. Both Jimmy and Marilyn were radiant. But, I must admit John (Marilyn's husband - who has stood by her during all these eight years) had the best line tonight - "I did really well through this whole ceremony - I didn't even make any animal noises." I love someone who can laugh.

Well, that's it. If I could have snuck in for the last 45 minutes of this deal it would have been better - sermon, commissioning and I'm out of there. Then I would have had to hear only one boring hymn.