If it's a long way to Tipperary, then it's light years to Banff. According to Drake, and his oil change records, we've driven 7000 miles between Sydney, Nova Scotia (where we got on the Newfoundland ferry) to Banff, Alberta. It's 3646 as the crow flies miles from St. John's Newfoundland to Banff, Alberta. If we continued on across Canada, it would be another crow fly 600 miles to Victoria, Vancouver Island. (It's also 1172 MORE miles from Banff to Fraser, CO - our two month 'fall' destination.) The Canadian portion of this massive trip is over in just a few more days. We've driven from Arizona to Texas to Connecticut to Massachusetts to Maine to New Brunswick, to Nova Scotia, to Newfoundland, to Quebec, to Ontario, to Manitoba, to Saskatchewan, to Alberta. We still will be driving from Alberta to Montana to Wyoming to Colorado and back to Arizona. The most important thing I've learned: It's more difficult than you imagine to be away from your own country for any extended period of time.
The suspicion there might be difficulties first struck us when the bored Canadian Border Patrol fine toothed searched our car and trailer because of our 'TEXAS' license plates. They wanted to make absolutely sure we were telling the truth when we claimed we were not bringing guns into Canada. Everyone knows that all Texans are gun totin' crazies, right?
We continually ran into this phenomenon: A total stranger walks up to the car, even once knocking on the side window, and says, "You're a long way from home, eh?" After the umpteenth time of this happening, Drake now answers, "Really? I'm trying to get to Houston. I must have taken a wrong turn at Fort Worth." Sometimes, the Canadian even gets the joke. Subconsciously, Canadians think Texas is still full of cowboys and Indians. When we say something to the effect that three of the top ten US cities are in Texas, and they are always amazed.
One thing we were already concerned about before we left the States was signing up for Medicare, (Yes, hard to believe, but we are 65!) Turns out, we were right to be vigilant. We started as early as possible, and with a combination of internet information, telephone calls, a virtual post office box, our persistent daughter, and FedEx, we were able to get 'er done. We actually received our medical cards from our 'advantage plan' at our post office box today. (FYI: If you are thinking of traveling away from your home for more than 30 days, I would get an internet post office boxes. We've had ours for years, and it's saved our bacon more than once.)
Continuing to be 'connected' when traveling out of the country is a complete hassle. First, if you think your current 'cell' bill is high, try buying an 'international plan' from your carrier. They are hideously expensive, and after you've checked your email, scrolled once through your Facebook account, and checked an 'attractions' page online where you're currently visiting, you've just used your allotted data for the month.
We did take a tip from our traveling daughter, and as soon as we crossed the Canadian Border, we bought a Canadian plan and 'loaded' it with money. This means we have had a Canadian telephone number which has come in handy ever since. All went well until we realized making ANY phone call costs at least $.50 per minute, and more to the states. That tends to rack up the dollars. It dawned on us, we needed to 'load' more money into the account. Then the problems started. They wouldn't let us add dollars to our account because our credit card billing address was 'different' from the phone's New Brunswick address. Well, duh. Even after numerous phone calls, and some mysterious form being filled out, it's still not resolved - but we did get the important thing: another gigabyte of data added to our account. We've got about $12 left with which to make phone calls.
Do not under any circumstance have a car wreck in a foreign country. As I've previously mentioned, Drake was involved in a deer suicide with our car. We were very fortunate. While the deer didn't fare well, there were no injuries to humans, and no mechanical damage to the car. HOWEVER, it's impossible to reach your US claims agent because first, there's 'phone tag' - expensive for us, as well as time difference problems, AND our assigned agent doesn't read her email. Recipe for frustration. Drake has drunk a lot of scotch over this.
We have also had our alternator fail suddenly on us. It was a blessing we were in the Banff Trailer Court campground when this happened. We had to call a tow truck (who ripped us off, of course), but the Ford dealership in the next town went out of their way to get us back up and running. More black thoughts and dire predictions by Drake over this mishap, but it turns out Banff is very bikeable. I shudder to think how difficult the car repair could have been since we've been many places out in the middle of nowhere with no cell service at all.
When you don't speak the language, and can't make yourself understood no matter how carefully you studied the pronunciation of the language, expect to perfect your charade performances. One of my goals was to learn how to pronounce French. OK, I thought I was doing great. I practiced and practiced as we drove in the first part of the trip in anticipation, that even though I couldn't SPEAK French, I would be able to read off menu items in Quebec or order a beer. The first Quebec day at Tim Horton's I asked for a blueberry muffin, and no one understood me when I said 'bluet'. Maybe, it was adding 'por favor' that was the problem. Initially, I kept getting common French and Spanish numbers and phrases confused. Anywho, I tried and tried. Finally, I was reduced to pointing, charades, and kind people to get what I wanted to eat. This becomes very, very old and very very frustrating after about three days. Yes, I guess this makes me an ugly American, but I just wanted people who spoke English after awhile.
When in a bi-lingual country, expect the grocery store run to take twice as long. No, I do not want air miles on my grocery store reward card which I don't have because I'm only going to use your grocery store ONCE. Brain has had to be re-trained to instantly recognize French and turn the box or can over. Everything to eat which is packaged at the grocery store is printed in English on one side and French on the other. I think bored and sadistic grocery store stockers turn the French side out in Western Canada and the English side out in Eastern Canada as they go about their jobs.
If you've ever thought you wanted to time travel, think again. So far, we've been in six time zones. Sometimes, they've even snuck up on us. Once, we crossed a time zone, and because of our car's analog clock, we didn't realize for several hours it was now an hour earlier, or was that an hour later? And, then, there's Newfoundland which has its own wacky time. It's a half hour off Atlantic time. I never knew what time we were leaving or arriving on the ferry trips to and from Newfoundland.
We have also been playing the game called we give the clerks bills and they give us back coins. Canada does not have dollar bills; they only have dollar coins. They even have two dollar coins. ('Loonies' and 'Toonies') Plus, there's the normal assortment of quarters, nickels, and dimes. There are no pennies. (We haven't missed those little copper disks in the slightest.) Drake hates carrying coins, so we have constantly been forgetful about taking our coins inside an establishment. Here's what happens. The clerk says, "That will be $11. 45." Drake gets this pained expression on his face which means, 'Damn it, I forgot to get the coins from the car, AGAIN." Speaking of bills, the Canadians bills are plastic. Yes, they are rectangles of plastic in different colors. (Queen Elizabeth II is on the sea green $20.) They are slick and difficult to handle. I'll be happy to be back in the land of paper money. Even Canadians don't like the plastic money. Getting cash is going to cost you a 'fee'. It doesn't matter what anybody at any banking institution told you in the States.
Truthfully, this trip has been a great learning curve for a real out of country trip. While Canadians abhor being thought of as Northern Americans, the reality is we share far more similarities than differences. The experiences I've enjoyed here have far outweighed the difficulties of being a foreigner. The size of this country is awe inspiring. The sparse population was one of many surprises. There are only 35 million Canadians as compared to 350 million Americans. We've been made to feel overwhelmingly welcomed here especially in places not normally thought of as tourist destinations. If you want to come to Canada, get in touch, Drake and I have paved the way for you.
