Drake Claims He's Married to a New Person

 

A bad selfie on the way to the eye doctor.....
No glasses!

Have you ever missed something?  I'm not talking about things lost in the jungle of your closet or the frustration of rifling through your junk drawer, or in my case peering into any number of lidded pots I use to conceal my 'clutter' I can't let go of.  [I actually have a small jacks ball with a tiny playing card suspended inside it.  Have no clue where it came from, but I'm not throwing it away.]   Nor am I talking about those certain foods you're avoiding.  

No, I'm talking about missing my nearsightedness.  I just had cataract surgery on both my eyes five days apart.  The reason the surgeries were so close together is we sprang for the all the bells and whistles lens'.  These new lens look like vinyl records with each groove being a level of vision.  It's going to take awhile for my brain to learn how to use these, and how to use them together. Currently, less than five days out from my second eye, I can see from about six inches from my face to infinity.  If that's not enough, my vision is supposed to improve over the next 30 days.  [As I'm typing this, my vision is moving between sharp and faintly blurred.]  My brain is in training.  It's learning not only how to use both eyes together but also to switch between the various vision levels.  

Ten feet and beyond has snapped in pretty quickly.  I can see with sharp vision in and around any room.  Out in the real world, I think of my vision as being to infinity and beyond!  I can easily see clearly at a distance, but my brain is sluggish at moving between a driving distance back to the street signs.  

OK, so that's physically what's happening.  So, the question is why would I miss being nearsighted?  I've been nearsighted since I was about seven years old.  At age 8, the teacher called my mother and suggested I couldn't really see the blackboard.  This was very typical in the 1950's especially in families where no one else wore glasses.  I saw the ophthalmologist about every six or eight months for the next seven years. I got more and more nearsighted, and my glasses got thicker and thicker.  At night, I watched the items disappear from my dresser, the doorknobs disappear from the doors, and even the covers at the end of the bed get fuzzy. 

At first, I was scared by what was happening.  Gradually, I relaxed, and began to realize since I couldn't see anything, I wasn't distracted by objects in the room.  I started living inside my head when I was very young.  There's a softness and relaxation level in the nearsighted world which is hard to explain to the 20/20 visionaries.  

When you wake up in the nearsighted world, you can just relax.  If you have to think about the upcoming day, no problem.  You can't see the clothes that need to be picked up; the shoes that need to be put away; or the rest of the clutter in the room.  If you're not pushed to get up to start the day, being nearsighted is REALLY relaxing.  You just lay back, and drift.  Sometimes, I even fall back asleep.  In the morning, that's never a problem for me.  

Another benefit of nearsightedness is you can't see dirt!  This can be very comforting in the shower or the tub especially if those fixtures don't belong to you.  I know, gross.  It's always easier to hit any bathroom while being nearsighted.  However, you never want to clean nearsighted -  you'll miss half the dirt.  

Finally, another benefit of being nearsighted is your close up vision is terrific.  If the rest of the world could be within six inches then all would be copacetic.  Since the cataract surgeries, I've lost that crystal clear close up vision. I've already realized I'll need 'cheaters' to thread needles, rip out stitches, see my face close up in a mirror, or do anything else right under my nose.  I can no longer see my armpits.  Not a great loss, but definitely a change since I now have to shave blind.

Naturally, by this time, you've realized I'm gently pulling your leg.  This really has been a massive adjustment.  I wake up and I'm startled when the room snaps into crystal clear focus.  I get up and reach for my glasses.  If I haven't automatically reached for them, I vaguely wander around my room and bathroom looking for 'something' until I realize it's my glasses my subconscious wants me to find.  At least once or twice a day I try to take off my non-existent glasses.  As compensation for losing my nearsightedness, I was able to buy a pair of sunglasses which don't look like some weird virtual reality headset.  

Prior to these surgeries I was having major anxiety.  The anxiety was swirling around my life, and kept being more and more directed to the cataract surgeries.  I finally figured out the 'trigger'.  I'd heard more than once cataract surgery was 'simple' and would be no problem.  The last time I had a simple surgery which would be no problem, I lost the ability to walk for about two years.  Once I figured this out AND had a consultation with my spiritual advisor, I calmed down enough to have the surgeries without complications.  

Now, I've further figured out that this has not been just a 'simple surgery' for me.  I never, ever expected the results I'm getting.  This has upended my world.  Sounds crazy?  Yep.  Try to imagine the way you interact with the world completely changes.  I really don't remember a time when I didn't wear glasses.  (Caveat:  I tried at 16 and 24 to wear contacts.  Both short lived and failures.)  When you frame the cataract surgeries in this lens, you can see why part of me misses being nearsighted. 

Now, those are some cute sunglasses!!!